I’ve been thinking long and hard about this. When did being a dad mean losing your testicles and giving them to your children? When did becoming a mom mean turning in your self worth for what your child thinks of you? In my generation everything was about taking care of your kids and taking care of yourself, working one or two jobs, both parents working, the kids were latch-key kids and they had chores to do to help mom and dad, since mom and dad had to work to support the family. I didn’t have one friend that didn’t have a job when they turned 16. I didn’t have one friend that got a car paid for by their parents or had their insurance paid for by their parents unless the kid was taking his brothers and sisters to school and being transportation for the family. We didn’t yell and scream at our parents for not getting our way; we just found a way to do it. If it meant saving up from a job, that is what we did. No one expected crap from their parents, we basically raised ourselves. Yes, we had expectations from our parents, but we meet those head on. Everything was a challenge to be met, a mountain to climb, an adventure; it was me against the world. My generation made its mistakes and we got into trouble, but all in all, the 80’s and 90’s were a pretty good time to grow up.
Now I look at the same people I grew up with, letting their children run the house hold, they accept yelling and door slamming from their children. They accept their children calling them assholes and bitches. They accept their children laying a guilt trip on them. They don’t hold their kids accountable for their actions. They don’t have expectations for their children. This generation gives prizes for a child that just shows up to compete and is in last place. We are now raising a generation (the y-generation, as in why not me) to expect to be given everything in life and to expect not to have to work for what you want. They cry, they complain, they have no idea what the world is really like. Some of them have made it to the workplace where I work. They want to know why they are expected to work. They want to know why, it the job requires overtime, they have to stay and finish a job. They want to know why they aren’t being paid more, and they want to know, when the boss finally gets tired of them, why they are fired. We have had to update polices to include no personal text messaging on company time because this generation doesn’t understand it is not proper business etiquette. We have to explain to the new employees that jeans are not part of business causal attire. I’ve had to explain that you do not answer a phone with, “Yeah, what.” All I can say is wow; I want my mommy and daddy. J
You were raised exactly like I was and the way I can proudly say, I raised my girls. However, my steps get whatever they want, when they want it. Shame - they have been robbed of becoming creative, producing members of society.
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is they aren't my children, therefore, I stand back and let their parents parent (and I use that term loosely) them. But it is a shame to see such waste.
I have a whole blog post brewing in my brain about the whys of parenting like they do. Thank you for rasing your kids with respect and responsibility! I think it's awesome when I meet people who do not take the easy route and are actually parents! YOu rock!!
ReplyDeleteThank you. It isn't easy but my motto is, "discipline is love" and I will go to my grave preaching it!
ReplyDeleteYour blog is a nice respite from my crazy world. I am a stepmother as well and well, ugh :)